The Springs Cup

In honor of the beginning of the Masters golf tournament today, I'd like to introduce you to one of golf's most sought-after trophies. The Springs Cup ranks right up there with the Green Jacket and the Claret Jug on the list of prizes any golfer would love to claim as his own. Since I am currently the possessor of the Springs Cup, and since I'll never wear the green jacket or hold the claret jug, I pretty much have to say that.

The Springs Cup is a hand-decorated cup supporter made of high-impact plastic, ensuring that it will be around for a long, long time. Brad Gartman (surprise) created the Cup in 2007 and held it in his own possession for the entire summer and fall of that year. This is important to note, as the Springs Cup is awarded to the loser of any Church @ the Springs sanctioned golf competition, rather than the winner. Said loser is required to carry this dubious award in his or her golf bag until such time as another loser takes possession of it. Inevitably it falls out of the bag when said loser is playing golf with people who aren't familiar with the cup's significance. Humiliation, after all, is the point of the Cup's existence. How do you explain that you have a cup supporter in your golf bag?

I have fallen into a slump this year and have come into possession of the Springs Cup. I also got busted for removing the cup from my bag before an out-of-town golf outing. It just seems to stick with you. It's like a bad slice--no matter what you do to try to shake it, it just won't go away. But I received some much-needed advice on my swing from my good friend Donnie St. Germain, and I think I'll be able to unload the cup at my next opportunity. I mention Donnie's name primarily so there will be someone else to blame if things don't go well.

One day, the Springs Cup will be awarded at an annual charity tournament in our community, which will support a worthy work and provide an opportunity for friends and neighbors to play together. I can't wait for that day. Until then, I have the only golf trophy Tiger Woods will never have on his mantel!